Are You Experiencing True Intimacy?

Loving CoupleAre you experiencing true intimacy, pure love, and true happiness in your relationship?

Don’t be upset if you’re not. More often than not, relationships need to take some time to get to those levels. And forget what you know of these levels from the movies or TV; it’s not about someone completing you or your other half, but something more – an idea of sharing because the heart is democratic after all. It’s not about being consumed with passion and losing your sense of self. Although that sounds nice, it will only hurt you in the end, as talked about in this Tiny Buddha article.

Lynn Newman writes, “You have to see your partner for who he or she really is. The romantic tragedy occurs when you view the person you are in love with as a symbol of what they have come to represent, the idea of them. When you realize that more often than not you don’t really know your partner, you begin to discover who they are and how they change and evolve. The key is to see the other as a mirror and learn from the reflection how you can be a better person. When you feel upset, rather than blame your partner and point fingers, remain awake to what has yet to be healed in yourself.”

The important part, it seems, when it comes to maintaining a strong relationship is to never know your partner. In other words, always expect that their heart is bottomless, that their soul is trenched up at the bottom of the sea. That way, there is always something new to discover.

Written by Rabbi Lebow

Rabbi Lebow

Rabbi Lebow offers interfaith wedding services throughout the United States

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